The 9 P’s of Winning

Want to know what all the most successful business people, athletes, celebrities and politicians know?

Author Frank I. Luntz says WINNERS (not the Charlie Sheen kind) possess nine common principles that anyone can incorporate in their own life. It’s no magic potion. It’s these essentials:

People Centeredness – Paradigm Breaking – Prioritization — Perfection –Partnership — Passion — Persuasion — Persistence — Principled Action

1) People-Centeredness: Winners know what makes people tick, and they connect either to our fears or our aspirations—or both. The job of all winning communicators is to recognize what is missing in others’ lives and then try to address it. Winners help us imagine the possibilities that change our realities. The people-centered approach is to address, resolve, and alleviate personal pain—to focus on “solutions” rather than the management of the problem.

Winning Trait: Discover what people need and help them get it.

2) Paradigm Breaking: Winners are not improvers; they are game-changers. Remember, as much as we say we want change, it is natural to resist it. As human beings, we innately fear the unknown, even if we simultaneously embrace it. The best communicators know how to position their new product or idea as an improvement that people should expect to have—not a burden they’ll have to bear.

Winning Trait: Present change as an improvement, not a burden.

3) Prioritization: They (winners) know how to separate what must be done from what should be done—and that has a direct correlation to what they say and when they say it. In fact, identifying and effectively articulating priorities may be the single most important component of successful communication. Winners prioritize their messages. In fact, in the era of texting and Twitter, the longer you speak, the less people hear.

Winning Trait: Carefully select what you say and what you do.

4) Perfection: If you’re not driven to perfection, you’ll never reach excellence. It’s one thing to work sixteen-hour days because you have to. It’s another to work sixteen-hour days because you want to. Winners who are passionate about their work don’t mind a sixteen-hour day if that’s what it takes for them to be the best they can possibly be.

Winning Trait: You don’t have to be perfect. But you have to be your very best.

5) Partnership: No one is perfect. Honest, open communication is paramount for a partnership to survive. Without it, trust and respect will simply wither. Partnerships thrive on achieving the right balance that maximizes the “good” and minimizes the “bad” that each side brings to the relationship.

Winning Trait: Don’t let “bad” fester. Communicate clearly with your partner and turn it into “good.”

6) Passion: There isn’t a winner anywhere who doesn’t bring passion to what they do or how they communicate. 

There are three language attributes at play:
- First, they communicate confidence in themselves and in their products;
- Second, the message always rests on results and solutions; and
- Third, there is a clear call to action at the end.

But passion is about more than just words and languages. Effectively communicating passion requires focus on style and delivery.

Winning Trait: Passion isn’t something you just have; it’s something you share.

7) Persuasion: Winners don’t preach; they persuade. They tell you exactly why you should accept their point of view, yet you feel like you came to their conclusions on your own.

Winning Trait: Persuasion is explaining why an idea is great; not how it’s their great idea.

8) Persistence: Winners know how to succeed over the long haul. In fact, they know that winning is defined by repeat performances and increasing achievements. Winners never give up, never accept defeat, and work as long and as hard as it takes to get the job done right. Winners commonly say, “Don’t tell me why I can’t do it. Tell me how I can get it done.”

Winning Trait: Persist until you perspire.

9) Principled Action: What good is winning at work if you lose at life? The concluding chapter puts in perspective the essential nature of a set of the guiding principles that define true winners. It focuses on those who gave up their morality, humanity, and decency in the chase for success—and how they fell from grace because winning wasn’t just everything, it was the only thing.

Winning Trait: Winning is whole-life success in all areas, not just one.

Shaking Hands

When meeting someone for the first time, the first form of contact we have with them would be the handshake. Everyone knows how to shake hands but in order for you to look confident and leave a lasting first impression through this pre-conversational gesture, here are some guidelines that you should follow.

1. Be Ready: Approach the other person with your hand already extended. Make the first move and do this in one movement to look confident and assured.

2. Make Eye Contact and Smile: When shaking their hand, make eye contact with them and remember to smile. Studies have repeatedly shown that maintaining eye contact for a mere 3 seconds can make the other person develop positive feelings for you. By smiling, you lighten the atmosphere and make them feel comfortable around you.

3. Use the Right Strength: When shaking their hand, grasp their hand firmly but not tightly. A tight handshake may lead to discomfort for the other party, especially for older individuals. Try to match the grip of the other person for the optimal handshake.

4. No Sweaty Palms: If you tend to have sweaty palms, make it a point to keep them dry especially when you see someone approaching or you are about to approach someone. A handshake with a sweaty palm is definitely not the best way to leave a good first impression.

5. Use Your Right Hand: It is tradition that we shake hands with our right hand. This is the case even for left-handers. If you are at a company dinner (or any similar social event), always carry your beverage in your left hand. This leaves your right hand dry and free for handshakes.

6. Adapt to The Different Types Of Handshakes: Different people have different ways of shaking hands. In fact, in different countries, handshakes are done very much differently. The most common handshake is a brisk up-down motion but there are many variations to this. For example, some people shake hands with their left hand placed on top of the two clasped hands to provide additional warmth. Others may continue shaking hands for several seconds. My suggestion would be to adapt to the other person’s version of the handshake and go with the flow.

7. Have Something To Say: When shaking hands, remember to always have some introductory line to say. A silent handshake can be rather awkward and you would also lose the chance to build some familiarity right from the start. What you could do is to maintain eye contact with the other person and say something like “it’s nice to meet you” or “how do you do?”

‎3 Simple Rules for a Networking Game Plan:

1. Be curious; ask questions and LISTEN to the answers. People love a good listener who is sincerely interested in what they do.

2. Learn from everybody...Talk with people at ALL levels because everyone can teach you something.

3. Cultivate contacts; with people in power who can bring you ideas, support and opportunities, and people who enjoy making money and whose HEARTS and interests are like your own.

Oh yea and don't forget: ENJOY YOUR COMMUNICATION!!!

Self-Discipline

Self-discipline is a pattern of behavior where you choose to do what you know you should do, rather than what you want to do. It’s the inner power that pushes you to get out of bed to exercise rather than sleeping in. It is the assertion of willpower over more basic desires and is synonymous with self-control.

It includes having the personal initiative to get started and the stamina to persevere. Being disciplined gives you the strength to withstand hardships and difficulties, whether physical, emotional or mental. It allows forgoing immediate satisfaction, in order to gain something better, but which requires effort and time.

Discipline is one of the cornerstones to living a successful and fulfilling life and something we should all strive to master.

Benefits of becoming a disciplined person

When you are consistent in doing the things you know you should do, when you know you should do them, here are the benefits you will enjoy:

• You will achieve your goals. When you are consistent in doing the things you know you should do, your odds of achieving your goals will be dramatically increased.

• You self-esteem will soar. Every time you push yourself to do something you know you should do, you are building your self-esteem.

• People’s respect for you will grow. This includes everyone from your spouse to your employer who witnesses your efforts.

• You will influence the lives of others. Every good and right thing you do, influences the lives of those who are watching and can have a ripple effect on future generations.

• You will see greater success in all areas of your life. Jim Rohn said, “For every disciplined effort there is a multiple return.” Think about it.

• You will enjoy a more rewarding and satisfying life.

Downside of lacking discipline

When you consistently neglect to do the things you know you should do, when they should be done, here’s the downside:

• You won’t achieve your goals. I’ve never met anyone who achieved any worthwhile goal who lacked discipline.

• You won’t feel good about yourself. No matter how hard you try to justify your actions, you know what’s right and wrong. Lying to yourself only makes it worse.

• You’ll lose the respect of those who are dependent upon your actions.

Making the decision to become a disciplined person may prove to be one of the most important decisions you make because of its powerful influence on every part of your life.

A commitment to discipline

The first step in becoming a disciplined person is to make a commitment to yourself that from this day forward you are going to do the things you know you should do, when you should do them. As part of this commitment, you cannot allow yourself to make excuses or justify not doing what you should do.

If you struggle with discipline, start small. It’s how we all got started. Start by taking out the overflowing garbage, answering an email, changing the light bulb, or cleaning your bathroom. Start today doing all the little things you know you should do, but don’t feel like doing.

When you need to do things that make you uncomfortable, remember the wise words of leadership expert Dr. John Maxwell who said, “If we’re growing, we’re always going to be out of our comfort zone.”

When things come up that are scary, heed the experience of Dale Carnegie who said, “Do the thing you fear to do and keep on doing it… that is the quickest and surest way ever yet discovered to conquer fear.”

Becoming a discipline person will likely be the hardest thing you do, but it can also become the most rewarding. All successes in every part of your life are built on the foundation of discipline.

I want to challenge you to start doing the little things you know you should do. As you do, recognize yourself for each thing you do. With constant awareness and sustained effort you can actually train yourself to become disciplined.

This is not the first time I have blogged on the importance of discipline, and it won’t be the last. Of the over 1000 little things on my list, nothing has a higher dollar value to the market than discipline.

Discipline is one of the key differentiators separating those who live successful and fulfilling lives from those who don’t.

"The Rich Get Richer"

“The rich get richer and the poor get poorer.” You have heard it a million times. However, my guess is that you have never heard it from the mouth of the “rich.” Instead, this echo has most likely bounced to your ear with its origins being an excuse. That’s right... an excuse. Excuses are what many use to pacify their guilt of not accomplishing what they are capable of.

I am not suggesting that wealth is success. My inference is that success is the progressive realization of predetermined worthwhile goals. It may be something as simple as raising a family.

What do these names have in common?
Richard Nixon
Gerald Ford
Jimmy Carter
Ronald Reagan
Bill Clinton

They were all president of the United States, right? They were all the most powerful man in the world at one point. However, I am looking for something else.

Richard Nixon was born in the home his father built. He won an award from Harvard his senior year of high school. However, his family was unable to afford his leaving home for college. He instead attended Whittier College.

Gerald Ford was born as Leslie Lynch King Jr. In 1913 his mother left her abusive husband and took her son to live with her parents. She met Gerald R. Ford, whom she married and he gave her child his name Gerald Rudolph Ford Jr. He was the only president to be adopted. Ford worked in his stepfather’s paint and varnish store growing up. He coached boxing during college to afford his tuition.

Jimmy Carter was the first member of his family ever to go to college and his father was a peanut farmer.

Ronald Reagan was the son of an alcoholic traveling shoe salesman. He worked his way into show business by broadcasting baseball games. At the age of 40, he was divorced and his career was at a dead end.

Bill Clinton was born William Jefferson Blythe IV. His father (a traveling salesman) died in an automobile accident three months before he was born. His mother married Roger Clinton and Bill took that name. Clinton grew up in a turbulent family. His stepfather was a gambler and alcoholic who regularly abused his wife, and sometimes Clinton’s half brother Roger.

None of these men were born into wealth and prosperity, yet they each achieved the rank of most powerful person in the world by working hard and not making excuses. These five presidents were born into normal families who struggled. Yet, they refused to use that as an excuse.

Life is too short to make excuses. Set your goals and pursue them. If you have been dealt a “worse” hand than another, it may indeed be a gift that teaches you the value of hard work. Your story will be richer and your success sweeter when you achieve your dreams. Maybe one day I will cast a vote for you as president of the United States.

How To Be A Top Achiever

10 Attitudes of Top Achievers 

If you believe/feel/think the same way as the top achievers believe/feel/think, you will begin to get the same results they do. Here are 10 psychological and practical ways to mirror the attitudes of top achiever, time to get to work and make any necessary changes needed:

1. Don’t see yourself as a “salesperson”, rather see yourself as a consultant. Believe/feel/think you are a problem-solver with regard to your product/service and how the client can best use it.

2. Become a doctor of relationships & consulting with your clients, customers and prospects. Act in the best interests of your “patients” and have a high code of ethics.

3. See yourself as the president of your own relationship “sales”/consulting corporation. Accept 100 percent responsibility for your results.

4. Commit yourself to being the best in your field. Dedicate yourself to lifelong learning. A little personal development every day goes a long way to making yourself better!

5. Be ambitious, hungry, and determined to use your business as a steppingstone to the success you want in life…do something different, GO ABOVE & BEYOND THE NORM!

6. Have integrity. Be honest with yourself and others.

7. Engage in thorough preparation prior to every call.

8. Be an excellent listener; be extremely client/customer/prospect-focused. If you build/cultivate a more personal relationship with them, they’ll tell you what they want/need.

9. Have tremendous courage. Be willing to face your fears of rejection and failure, and overcome them. Go for no; the more No’s you get the more Yes’s you’ll get as well!

10. Be highly persistent. Start your workday earlier, work harder, and stay longer.

To make these changes work for you consistently; you must walk, talk and behave consistently with them every hour of every day.