1. Make the commitment to reach your goal. “One person with a commitment is worth a hundred who only have an interest.” —Mary Crowley.
2. Commit yourself to detailed accountability. Record your progress toward your goals every night, and list the six most important things you need to do the next day. Daily discipline is the key to reaching your goals.
3. Build your life on a solid foundation of honesty, character, integrity, trust, love and loyalty. This foundation will give you an honest shot at reaching any goal you have set properly.
4. Break your intermediate and long-range goals into increments.
5. Be prepared to change. You can’t control the weather, inflation, interest rates, Wall Street, etc. Change your decision to move toward a goal carefully—but be willing to change your direction to get there as conditions and circumstances demand.
6. Share your “give-up” goals (e.g., give up smoking, being rude, procrastinating, being late, eating too much, etc.) with many people. Chances are excellent they’re going to encourage you.
7. Become a team player. Remember: You can have everything in life you want if you will just help enough other people get what they want.
8. See the reaching. In your imagination see yourself receiving that diploma, getting that job or promotion, making that speech, moving into the home of your dreams, achieving that weight-loss goal, etc.
9. Each time you reach a goal your confidence will grow so that you can do bigger and better things. After accomplishing any goal, record it in your journal, weekly planner or portable digital device.
10. Remember, what you get by reaching your destination isn’t nearly as important as what you become by reaching your goals—what you will become is the winner you were born to be!
The use of postcards and greeting cards to increase the effectiveness of your marketing efforts is an ideal way to cost effectively stay in contact with your clients and prospects.
As marketing costs go up, we need to find better ways of achieving maximum marketing results without spending our entire marketing budget. The postcard and even greeting cards are an inexpensive proven method of:
Keeping in contact with long-term prospects
Cross-sell, up-sell, re-sell to existing customers
Re-activate dormant accounts
Distribute updated information
Invite prospects to attend an event or seminar
Offer your website URL to potential customers
Say ‘thanks’ to your active clientele and referral sources
Make announcements
Send appointment reminders
Kick-off special offers or a sale
You can use an online service to select any of 13,000+ cards available or simply create your own custom card from either a digital photo or something that was created in MS Publisher or Adobe Illustrator. Our service allows you to create personalized campaign cards, thus transforming your generic mailing into one that is individually personalized. Then you can send one or hundreds cards with a click of a button and the OUR SERVICE will print “REAL” Postcards or Greeting Cards, stamp them and mail them for LESS than $1.00 all in about 1 minute…What’s your time worth?CONTACT ME to find out about this site, how it works and how you can use it to enhance your marketing results!
Thus, by properly using Relationship Marketing to keep in touch with existing clients, leads and prospects this will differentiate you from others. Ideal Relationship Marketing is focused on the overall relationship rather than just one transaction. It’s important that your marketing message is crafted in a way that offers appreciation along with the sharing of valuable beneficial info. This too will set you apart from others as you won’t be perceived as someone trying to GET something, but instead… someone offering (GIVING) something.
Some time ago, the owner of a small but profitable business wrote columnist Ann Landers about his practice of giving annual bonuses to his employees. The amounts were based on time served and salary levels.
He had been doing it for 16 years, and in all that time, only two employees had ever said thank you. Neither was still with the company. One passed away, and the other took early retirement.
The owner vowed that he wasn’t going to give any more bonuses, and if anyone complained, the response would be: “There will be no bonuses this year because not one of our current employees has taken the time and trouble to say thank you.”
In her answer, Ann Landers segued from that letter to the tons of letters she receives from others, parents and grandparents in particular, who wanted to know what to do about gifts that are not acknowledged. What happened? Did the poor thing lose the power of speech or the use of their writing hand? Did they fall off the ends of the earth? Was the gift lost in the mail?
How many times have we sent a birthday check and not heard a word back, the only evidence that the gift was received found among the pile of canceled checks returned from the bank?
How many times have you given a larger than normal tip without any recognition? Waiters and waitresses should realize a larger tip is a signal that a customer enjoyed the experience and wants to return, particularly if their generosity is acknowledged. Diners even have been known to ask for a favorite waitperson’s station.
If you’re a salesperson or own a company and have recently received a larger-than-expected order from a customer, what have you done to make that customer know how you feel about it? It’s great to take your spouse out to dinner to celebrate your great sales ability, but what about the guy or gal who gave you the order?
A thank-you is just good manners. A prompt thank-you is easy to say—a lot easier to say than “Gee, I forgot to tell you how much I appreciated your order” or “How’ve you been after all this time?”
When Rudy Giuliani was mayor of New York City, the police enforced quality-of-life laws, and Giuliani even called for New York City’s cabdrivers and waiters to improve their manners, pointing out that rudeness is not a great civic selling point. It seemed to work. Crime went down. Tourism went up. New York City was on a roll.
Many companies wait until the holidays to say thank you. There’s nothing the matter with that, but why wait? It’s a lot more personal and responsive to seize the day and say the magic words the moment it’s appropriate. And forget the stuff with your corporate logo on it as a thank-you. It’s fine as advertising. For yourself. But it isn’t a gift.
The best gifts I have ever received have no monetary value, but what I call memento value. They are the letters or cards I receive from people who have used tips or advice I’ve given in speeches, columns or books to get jobs, bonuses or unexpected orders. When a 72-year-old woman wrote to thank me for helping her make a dynamic splash in her chosen field, I was on cloud nine for days. And what an upper it was to hear from a man in prison that he’d begun to turn his life around, thanks to the inspiration he’d received from one of my books.
One area of thank you territory that many of us neglect is our formative years. They don’t call them “formative” for nothing. Have you ever said thanks to the teachers and coaches who lifted you up, dusted you off and set you straight when you were trying to figure out what growing up was all about? Though it may have been decades, you would be surprised how many of them remember us and remain our cheerleaders throughout our life. Believe me, a note or even a phone call from you would be well-received.
The Best Gift to Give Yourself and Others by Jim Rohn
I’m often asked the question, “How can I best help my children, spouse, family member, staff member, friend, etc., improve/change?” In fact, that might be the most frequently asked question I receive, “How can I help change someone else?”
My answer often comes as a surprise and here it is. The key to helping others is to help yourself first. In other words, the best contribution I can make to someone else is my own personal development. If I become 10 times wiser, 10 times stronger, think of what that will do for my adventure as a father... as a grandfather... as a business colleague.
The best gift I can give to you, really, is my ongoing personal development. Getting better, getting stronger, becoming wiser. I think parents should pick this valuable philosophy up. If the parents are okay, the kids have an excellent chance of being okay. Work on your personal development as parents—that’s the best gift you can give to your children.
If you have ever ridden in an airplane, then you might have noticed the oxygen compartment located above every seat. There are explicit instructions that say, “In case of an emergency, first secure your own oxygen mask and then if you have children with you secure their masks.” Take care of yourself first... then assist your children. If we use that same philosophy throughout our whole parental life, it would be so valuable.
If I learn to create happiness for myself, my children now have an excellent chance to be happy. If I create a unique lifestyle for myself and my spouse, that will be a great example to serve my children.
Self-development enables you to serve, to be more valuable to those around you; for your child... your business... your colleague... your community... your church.
That’s why I teach development skills. If you keep refining all the parts of your character (yourself, your health, etc.) so that you become an attractive person to the marketplace, you’ll attract opportunity. Opportunity will then begin to seek you out. Your reputation will begin to precede you and people will want to do business with you. All of that possibility is created by working on the philosophy that success is something you attract by continually working on your own personal development.
Seven Things You Must Give to Others If You Want to Achieve Success! by Chris Widener
A major part of the process of achieving success and living the kind of life that you dream of is to give. Many people think that to get what you want you have to take it. There is a universal truth though that the true path to get what you want is to give. When you give, you get. What you sow, you shall reap. If this is true, then what is it we must give? I’ll show you the way...
Give Others Your Honesty The world we live in has a simple rule that most follow: Lie when you have to. Unfortunately, this may make some people wealthy but it makes us humans poor. To achieve success is to become wealthy not only in money, but in character. To be successful, truly successful, is to be able to attain your goals and keep your character at the same time!
“Honesty is the single most important factor having a direct bearing on the final success of an individual, corporation or product.” —Ed McMahon
Mr. McMahon is right, though others will tell you otherwise. Some people will say, “You have to bend the truth to get ahead.” Not true. Some of the most successful people who have ever lived were honest people.
How about you? Are you honest in all things? The problem with little lies is they become big ones. Lies spin out of control. You get caught in one lie and you lie to get out of it, etc.
In all things and at all times, give others your honesty.
Give Others Your Respect Most of the time, we give people respect based on what they have done or what they have accomplished. We gauge whether or not they are “worthy” of it based on what we know of what they have achieved or who they know or are related to.
But I believe we should have a higher standard. We respect people not for what they have done, or for who they are related to, or for what they can do for us. Instead, we respect people for simply being.
What would happen in our world, in our company, and yes, even in our families, if we started with respect for everyone else rather than making them earn it? I think we would see that most people would live up to the respect that we give them!
Give Others Your Vulnerability We are taught to “be strong.” And yes, we should be strong. But we have also embraced something that I think keeps us from having the kind of life that we long for. It is an attitude that keeps us from experiencing the kind of relationships that would bring deep meaning to us. It is our attitude about vulnerability.
“Make yourself vulnerable and people will step all over you!” It is true that this will happen. But I have also seen that most people will be drawn to you. They will help you. They will open up to you. You see, we are all broken people inside. We all have secrets. Yet everyone plays the poser. When one lets down his veil, others soon follow—and we all win.
Give Others Your Care Too many people are running around this old earth not caring about others. The days of “Look Out for Number One” and “Winning through Intimidation” are over! Let’s bring about a new day when we can care about others AND succeed!
Take the time to show people you care. Listen to them. Empathize with them. Love them. Now, I don’t mean that you have to go around hugging everyone—that probably wouldn’t fly in corporate America anyway—but we can take some time to step back from business and be human! And I have found that when we do so, our business succeeds as well!
Give Others Your Passion There is nothing this world needs more than passionate people. And people need passionate people. Living in this day and age can be tiring. The hustle and bustle of it all can wear you down and tire you out. Give your passion to others and fire them up.
Don’t just be humdrum. Be excited. Give people all the energy you can muster. And you will find that energy reciprocal. They will get energized and passionate. This in turn will fire you up more when you are already charged and get you going when you don’t feel like moving at all!
Give Others Your Experience We all have areas that we excel in and they are usually areas that we have experience in. One of the things we can do to make our lives more meaningful and be of utmost help to others is to show them the way through the experiences we have.
Sometimes it will be what they should do: Shortcuts to take, people to meet, etc. Sometimes it will be what they should not do: Shortcuts not to take and people to stay away from! Whatever it is, we can be of service to others by giving them our experience and ultimately it will make us all better!
Give Others Your Help All in all, what we want to do is to help others. Zig Ziglar says that if we will “help others get what they want, we will in turn get what we want.” If we want to be successful, we should consider ourselves servants of other people. What can we do to help them and make them better? This is the true path to greatness and success, not only in business but in life!
If you want to live the life you have always dreamed of, ask yourself if you:
Give Others Your Honesty Give Others Your Respect Give Others Your Vulnerability Give Others Your Care Give Others Your Passion Give Others Your Experience Give Others Your Help
Motivation is a contraction of motive and action. An inner force that compels behavior, it comes from within, not from any external circumstance. You know where you’re going because you have a compelling image inside, not a travel poster on the wall, a financial statement with a big bonus, or a slogan in the hall. The performance of many externally motivated individuals begins declining as soon as they win contests of one sort or another. I’ve personally witnessed this among Super Bowl champions and World Cup teams that lost the incentive to maintain their excellence after winning the cup, the honors, and the cash.
If you’re really committed to peak performance and leadership, you must motivate yourself from within. Studies of achievers show that inner drives for excellence and independence are far more powerful than desire for wealth, status or recognition.
The Inner Drive Behavioral scientists have found that independent desire for excellence is the most telling predictor of significant achievement.
In other words, the success of our efforts depends less on the efforts themselves than on our motives. The most successful companies, like the most successful men and women in almost all fields, have achieved their greatness out of a desire to express what they felt had to be expressed. Often it was a desire to use their skills to their utmost in order to solve a problem. This is not to say that many of them did not also earn a great deal of money and prestige. William Shakespeare, Thomas Edison, Estee Lauder, Walt Disney, Oprah Winfrey, Sam Walton and Bill Gates all became wealthy. But far more than thoughts of profit, the key to their success was inspiration and inner drive by creating or providing excellence in a product or a service. All were motivated by the desire to produce the very best that was in them.
Go for the Inner Applause The late Ray Kroc, a former neighbor of mine who founded McDonald’s Corporation when he was in his 50s, stressed the importance of people working for the inner satisfaction, not just for the money. Ray said most people find it difficult to associate applause with their work when they can’t hear literal applause—but the important applause should come from within. It is the faster heartbeat, the pride and satisfaction of accomplishment.
Kroc told the University of Southern California’s Business School that the first thing a business executive needs is love of an idea.
If you don’t love your concept, drop it. If you prostitute yourself at an early age by taking a job where the money is, you’ll be working for money all your life. Loving their work is particularly important for younger people. If they lose that love early, they may never grow to anywhere near their potential for self-actualization.
Hire People Who Have Empowered Themselves An inner drive for excellence motivates you always to be the best you possible can in whatever you do. Leaders and managers should take special note here. They must be careful in their use of external motivators—money, perks, prestigious offices and titles—in trying to inspire their team members and employees. Enduring motivation must always come ultimately from within the individual.
That’s why empowerment and vision are so crucial to team performance and quality. Their power and their vision, not those of the leader, must compel team members. Interviewing potential members, you should look for internally motivated individuals who hold their work important for its own sake, who love their field or their industry, who seek the exhilaration of testing their limits and contributing to the world. Be wary if they show more interest in your compensation package than in their contributionpackage.
Commit to achieving peak performance and leadership, by motivating yourself from within!
You may be wondering why I would call this article a Thankful Thanksgiving. Aren’t all Thanksgivings Thankful? Unfortunately, no. As a person who has experienced over 75 Thanksgivings, I recognize that being thankful is something that we have to work at, even on Thanksgiving.
If your home is like most, your Thanksgiving Day will be very busy, with either traveling to where you want to go or preparing your home to have others over for the day. Either way, that can be very hectic and emotionally trying, which doesn’t lend itself to preparing your heart to be reflective and thankful. In fact, Thanksgiving weekend is the most traveled weekend in America. Airports are full, and don’t always provide much room for contemplation of your good fortune.
This means all the more that if we want to be the kind of people who are characterized by thankfulness, then we must make sure that we focus on it, and not just on Thanksgiving Day, but at all times during the year.
Here are a few key words as well as some thoughts that are simple and practical to apply—something you can use right away in your quest for becoming more thankful:
Time. Set aside time regularly to be quiet, to reflect. We live in the fastest-paced time ever. From the moment we awake to the moment we collapse into bed, we have the opportunity to go at full speed and never slow down. If we schedule time every day in which we can be quiet and reflect, we will free our hearts and minds from the tyranny of the urgent and rushed.
Thought. Give thought to the many blessings you have. Living in a consumer culture, most of us are fully aware of what we do not have and how we absolutely must have “it.” But how often do we reflect upon that which we already have? Take some time each day and think of one or two things that you have that you may typically take for granted, and then take a moment and give thanks for those. In fact, I make it a part of my reflection time to review a list of things that I’m thankful for.
Generosity. Be generous toward those with less and not envious of those with more. We tend to look at others who may be wealthier than ourselves and think, “I sure wish I had what he does.” That kind of thinking breeds envy and jealousy rather than contentment. What can we do to break that cycle? I would suggest being generous to those who are less fortunate than yourself. Go to work at a food bank. And not just during the holidays—everybody works there then—but on a regular basis during the year. That will remind you of how good you really have it.
Ask. Ask a friend what they are thankful for. The next time you are at lunch with a friend, ask him or her what they are most thankful for. You will be amazed at the answers you receive and you will create a meaningful bond with your friends as you focus on this powerful question.
Acknowledge. Lastly, tell those you love how thankful you are for having them in your life. So many times we neglect to take the time to craft the words to express to those closest to us what their presence in our lives means to us. Take the opportunity of Thanksgiving Day to write them a note, or sometime during the day put your hand on their shoulder, look them in the eyes and tell them. Let them know what they mean to you, and in return you’ll begin to create the possibility of deeper, richer, more fulfilling relationships with those you love.
Of course, we should do what we can to make the most of the day we call Thanksgiving, but wouldn’t it be a shame if the only time we reflected on our blessings was that one Thursday in November? And the answer is, of course! So let’s do our best to be aware of the many great gifts that we have each and every day of the year. As we do so we will see our hearts soar and our minds will experience more and more peace as we regularly remember and remain aware of our good fortune.
Each and every day, there are people all around the country and world who are living their dreams. Millionaires are made every day. Families are experiencing tremendous relationships. People are becoming more and more healthy. Lifelong learners are growing intellectually and improving their chances for success.
The fact is, living the life of your dreams is possible. People prove that every day. Someone somewhere is going to get rich, get healthy and improve their life. My recommendation is this: Let it be you!
Have you ever wanted to make more money? Have you ever looked at someone who has money and wished it could be you? People think about getting wealthy all the time, when only a small percentage actually do. But any of the masses could. Someone is going to start a business. Someone is going to make a great investment. Someone is going to begin the journey to great wealth. So why not let it be you?
Someone is going to decide to improve their relationships. Someone is going to enjoy love with their family. Someone is going to schedule some meaningful time with their friends. So why not let it be you?
Someone is going to go back to school to improve their life. Someone is going to become a lifelong learner. Someone is going to set a goal to read a book or listen to a CD each week for the next year. So why not let it be you?
Someone is going to look in the mirror and see that they need to lose a little weight and make the decision to become healthy. Someone will run their first marathon. Someone will join an aerobics class and improve their health. Why not let it be you?
I think that by now you get the point: Everyday people are improving their lives. Whether you do or don’t doesn’t matter to those who do. They are going to do it, regardless. It is simply a matter of a decision being made. Let that person be you!
You may be asking, “OK, Jim, but how?’ Well, let’s cover the very simple actions.
The first and most important thing to do is to make a commitment to work on yourself. Are you going to improve or stay the same? No matter what you have achieved, you are at a certain point right now. What you have achieved in the past is fine, but it doesn’t make a difference for the future. The decision about what you will become is made each and every day. Each day, someone is making the decision to better himself. Let that person be you!
The second is to make a plan. Once you have decided to become better, you will have to have a plan. It doesn’t have to be a long, intricate plan. It can be simple. Save a dollar a day. Walk a mile a day. Read an article a day. It’s a simple plan with achievable goals. Someone is going to develop a plan that will take them into the future of their dreams. Let it be you!
The third is to begin to act. All of the great ideas, without action, become stale and useless. The key to turning dreams into reality is action. People who have great ideas are a dime a dozen. People who act on their dreams and ideas are the select few, but they are the ones who gain the health, wealth and wisdom that is available. Someone will act today. Let it be you.
My encouragement to you is to stop looking at others who live the good life, wishing that you were as well, and begin to commit to your improvement, develop a plan and act on it. Someone is going to. Let it be you!
Leadership is about change. If you need no change, you need no leader. In times of change, people seek out more and better leaders. Those successful sought-out leaders embrace the following thought: “The best reformers the world has ever known are those who began with themselves.”
Mahatma Gandhi said, “We must be the change that we envision.” Tolstoy said, “Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” The following comments are about personal change:
One person cannot change another person. When I started as a young leader, I thought that a leader could change the people; and boy, did I work at it. I said, “All right, I’m going to give them thoughts, ideas, and principles; and I’m going to change people.”
After several years, I awakened to the thought that the only person who can change himself or herself is himself or herself. You can change yourself, but I cannot change you. You see, I am responsible to you but I am not responsible for you; and there is a world of difference between those two. I am responsible for teaching you good leadership. I am responsible for sharing things that can help add value to your life, but you are the only one who can take responsibility to change yourself, and that is what this whole article is about.
Most people need to look at the way that they look at change. How many times have you heard somebody say, “I sure hope things will change.” The only way things will change for me is when I change. It has nothing to do with hope. You can’t just say, “Well, I just hope things will change around me,” and expect results. The only way that things will change for me is when I change.
I have also heard this before, “I don’t know why I’m this way.” Well, you are the way you are because that is the way you want to be. Let’s expose it for what it really is.
When you make the right personal changes, other things begin to turn out right. So when people say, “I’d like things to turn out better for me; I’d like things to turn out right; I’d like things to turn out better in the organization, or in my family,” I say to them, “Start by making personal changes.”
1. The Law of Control: You feel good about yourself to the degree at which you feel you are in control of your own life.
2. The Law of Responsibility: You are completely responsible for everything you are and for everything you become and achieve.
3. The Law of Direction: Successful people have a clear sense of purpose and direction in every area of their lives.
4. The Law of Compensation: You are always fully compensated for whatever you do, positive or negative.
5. The Law of Service: Your rewards in life will always be in direct proportion to the value of your service to others.
6. The Law of Applied Effort: All things are amenable to hard work.
7. The Law of Overcompensation: If you always do more than you are paid for, you will always be paid more than you are getting now.
8. The Law of Preparation: Effective performance is preceded by painstaking preparation.
9. The Law of Forced Efficiency: The more things you have to do in a limited period of time, the more you will be forced to work on your most important tasks.
10. The Law of Decision: Every great leap forward in life is preceded by a clear decision and a commitment to action.
11. The Law of Creativity: Every advance in human life begins with an idea in the mind of a single person.
12. The Law of Flexibility: Success is best achieved when you are clear about the goal but flexible about the process of getting there.
13. The Law of Persistence: Your ability to persist in the face of setbacks and disappointments is your measure of your belief in yourself and your ability to succeed.
ONE HUNDRED WAYS TO LIVE TO A HUNDRED…TAKE A FEW TO HEART…
1. Enjoy yourself. 2. Stay young at heart. 3. Be honest and open. 4. Look for rainbows. 5. Walk to work. 6. Take the stairs. 7. Keep your curiosity. 8. Stop smoking. 9. Listen to your body. 10. Watch what you eat. 11. Watch what you say. 12. Make time for your children. 13. Don't rest on your laurels. 14. Drink lots of water. 15. Have faith in others. 16. Walk in the park. 17. Forgive. 18. Be an optimist. 19. Make love. 20. Cross-country ski. 21. Discover romance. 22. Exercise regularly. 23. Do Tai Chi. 24. Try Yoga. 25. Plant a garden. 26. Eat plenty of fruit. 27. Golf. 28. Adopt a pet. 29. Laugh often. 30. Be positive. 31. Give, don't take. 32. Marry your sweetheart. 33. Celebrate your marriage. 34. Enjoy being single. 35. Relax. 36. Eat your greens. 37. Take up lawn bowling. 38. Do nothing in excess. 39. Do everything in excess. 40. Serve chicken noodle soup. 41. Practice what you preach. 42. Look before you leap. 43. Make time for your friends. 44. Reduce your cholesterol. 45. Early to bed, early to rise. 46. Don't mope. 47. Try new things. 48. Skinny dip. 49. Write to a friend. 50. Play tennis. 51. Commune with nature. 52. Sing in the car. 53. Write a poem. 54. Whistle while you work. 55. Read a book. 56. Take your medicine as prescribed. 57. Challenge yourself. 58. Count your blessings. 59. Indulge yourself. 60. "Carpe diem" (Seize the day). 61. Take setbacks in stride. 62. If you want to stop taking a medication, ask your doctor. 63. Cuddle. 64. Use olive oil. 65. Eat your Brussel sprouts. 66. Lighten up. 67. Choose a career you love. 68. Be active in your community. 69. Read the paper every day. 70. Sit up straight. 71. Keep your mind active. 72. Travel. 73. Soak in the tub. 74. Don't be jealous. 75. Eat an apple a day. 76. Be generous with hugs. 77. Make time for your partner. 78. Keep in touch with family. 79. Bake a pie. 80. Eat plenty of fish. 81. Get plenty of fresh air. 82. Be yourself. 83. Swim. 84. Make time for your grandchildren. 85. Control your temper. 86. Share. 87. Take nothing for granted. 88. Ask questions when your doctor gives you new medications. 89. Power walk at the mall. 90. Don't procrastinate. 91. Accept those things which you cannot change. 92. Don't drink and drive. 93. Create solutions, not problems. 94. Be sociable. 95. Feed the birds. 96. Pamper yourself once a day. 97. Go fishing. 98. Smile. 99. Smell the flowers. 100. Listen to your doctor.
“What the f*** is your plan? Mustard packs.” -- Paulie “Walnuts” Gualtieri, HBO’s “The Sopranos”
As many of you know or may not know, I’m a huge (fanatical might be a better word) fan of “The Sopranos,” in part because it appeals to my love of Jersey and my Italian heritage but mostly because of the quality of the character development and the great writing that made each show special.
Season 3 was one of my favorites. It had great writing, great characters (Can Gloria Trillo, I mean Annabella Sciorra, make “Eight in the Box”?) and some of the best episodes ever.
Episode 37, “Pine Barrens,” is a classic, definitely a favorite episode and where the above quote originates. The plot line centers on the concept of a very simple plan that goes awry.
The first fundamental rule of leadership is “Management of Attention.” This means you must have a plan, one that can achieve the goals set forth. Now, as we can see from the misadventures of Paulie and Christopher in the Pine Barrens, just having a plan doesn’t always work. You must have the right plan.
How can you be assured that your plan can work? Warren Buffett once said, “I want to be able to explain my mistakes. This means I do only the things I completely understand.” Therefore, a great plan comes from completely understanding what it takes to be successful.
The best answer for all of us is to pay very close attention to the mistakes in our professional field. In football, the best way to formulate plans on and off the field comes from watching other successful operations work, or from learning from the mistakes of others.
Since learning from mistakes helps leaders, the Harvard Business Review provides a list of 10 fatal flaws that can derail them:
1. Lack energy and enthusiasm: Paulie had planned to take his mother to the social security office, so this job was an inconvenience.
2. Accept own mediocre performance: Paulie had a bad attitude before doing the job; he felt the job was beneath his stature in the family.
3. Lack clear vision and direction: Had no clear understanding of the task at hand, or how he would perform the task. Decided to just “wing it.”
4. Have poor judgment: Dropped the Russian’s universal remote control on the floor, which started all the problems.
5. Don’t collaborate: Ignored Chrissie’s request to behave when first dealing with the Russian.
6. Don’t walk the talk: Walked in a circle in the Pine Barrens, which resulted in not being able to find his way out.
7. Resist new ideas: Paulie would not listen to Chrissie’s idea to stop in the Roy Rogers for a bite to eat.
8. Don’t learn from mistakes: The Russian was tougher than they first thought.
9. Lack interpersonal skills: Four years in the Army didn’t help Paulie develop a plan that would work.
10. Fail to develop others: “This guy can never come back to tell this story” were the words of wisdom Paulie received from Tony as this bad plan kept unfolding and unraveling.
Watch “Pine Barrens” and you can see that Paulie as leader was 10 for 10 on each item from the Harvard Business Review. We can learn how to be better leaders from HIS failed leadership.
LOVE THIS ARTICLE FROM DENIS WAITLEY - WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
Moving from Procrastination to Pro-Activation - Time To Get Started
Here are some ideas to help make you a victor over change rather than a victim of change:
Set your wake-up time a half hour earlier tomorrow and keep the clock at that setting. Use the extra time to think about the best way to spend your day.
Memorize and repeat this motto: “Action TNT: Today, not tomorrow.” Handle each piece of incoming mail only once. Answer your e-mail either early in the morning or after working hours. Block out specific times to initiate phone calls, take incoming calls, and to meet people in person.
When people tell you their problems, give solution-oriented feedback. Rather than taking on the problem as your own assignment, first, ask what’s the next step they plan to take, or what they would like to see happen.
Finish what you start. Concentrate all your energy and intensity, without distraction, on successfully completing your current major project.
Be constructively helpful instead of unhelpfully critical. Single out someone or something to praise instead of participating in group griping, grudge collecting or pity parties.
Limit your television viewing or Internet surfing to mostly educational or otherwise enlightening programs. Watch no more than one hour of television per day or night, unless there is a special program you have been anticipating. The Internet has also become a great procrastinator’s hideout for tension-relieving instead of goal-achieving activities.
Make a list of five necessary but unpleasant projects you’ve been putting off, with a completion date for each project. Immediate action on unpleasant projects reduces stress and tension. It is very difficult to be active and depressed at the same time.
Seek out and converse with a successful role model and mentor. Learning from others’ successes and setbacks will inevitably improve production of any kind. Truly listen; really find out how your role models do it right.
Understand that fear, as an acronym, is False Evidence Appearing Real, and that luck could mean Laboring Under Correct Knowledge. The more information you have on any subject—especially case histories—the less likely you’ll be to put off your decisions.
Accept problems as inevitable offshoots of change and progress. With the ever more rapid pace of change in society and business, you’ll be overwhelmed unless you view change as normal and learn to look for its positive aspects—such as new opportunities and improvements—rather than bemoan the negative.
There is actually no such thing as a “future” decision; there are only present decisions that will affect the future. Procrastinators wait for just the right moment to decide.
If you wait for the perfect moment, you become a security-seeker who is running in place, unwittingly digging yourself deeper into your rut. If you wait for every objection to be overcome, you’ll attempt nothing. Get out of your comfort zone and go from procrastinating to pro-activating. Make your personal motto: “Stop stewing and start doing!”
I am extremely leery of any quick-fix solution or overnight formula for success. In my opinion, they don't exist as we all have to work on ourselves to make it happen.In the words of Denis Waitley;
"Success is a process that continues, not a status that you reach. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned."
With that said, the following formula is one that has been shared with members of my family/friends to encourage them to break through the rut they are in and experience success. Therefore, if I would share it with my family, I must believe in the principles. I suggested that they begin to regularly do these three things:
1. Surround themselves with positive people who believe that this life is not all there is. Personally, I find this at my local church and with my close circle of friends and business team members. Look, I know we don't share the same faith in all cases and this message is not about my faith; it is about you finding a group of people who regularly meet together and have a belief that there is more to life than what we see. This is the first step to a positive outlook on life.
2. You must exercise weekly in order to stimulate endorphins and maintain an energetic life. The exercise of walking to the kitchen or curling 12 ounces does not count as exercise. I bike ride several miles twice a week, and two to three days a week do strength training. This is nothing difficult, but it makes a major difference in my attitude, mindset and motivation.
3. You MUST educate yourself through reading. The average CEO in America reads four to five books per month. The average American reads one book per year, and 60 percent of us don't get past the first chapter! Which are you? I am no CEO and I read at least 2 sometimes 3 books per month, so can you...make a promise to yourself to read at least one book per month. Read anything except the "gossip trade rags", it makes a difference!
Regardless, of what you read… develop a passion for reading and learning, and you will see your attitude and outlook on life begin to change. Any person who faithfully invests their time in these three areas may not break world records in levels of success. However, everything in me believes that they would see dramatic improvements. I believe in those three things so much, I have encouraged my family/friends to invest their time in these areas as well.
1. They look for and find opportunities where others see nothing.
2. They find a lesson while others only see a problem.
3. They are solution focused.
4. They consciously and methodically create their own success, while others hope success will find them.
5. They are fearful like everyone else, but they are not controlled or limited by fear.
6. They ask the right questions - the ones which put them in a productive, creative, positive mindset and emotional state.
7. They rarely complain (waste of energy). All complaining does is put the complainer in a negative and unproductive state.
8. They don’t blame (what’s the point?). They take complete responsibility for their actions and outcomes (or lack thereof).
9. While they are not necessarily more talented than the majority, they always find a way to maximize their potential. They get more out of themselves. They use what they have more effectively.
10. They are busy, productive and proactive. While most are laying on the couch, planning, over-thinking, sitting on their hands and generally going around in circles, they are out there getting the job done.
11. They align themselves with like-minded people. They understand the importance of being part of a team. They create win-win relationships.
12. They are ambitious; they want amazing - and why shouldn’t they? They consciously choose to live their best life rather than spending it on auto-pilot.
13. They have clarity and certainty about what they want (and don’t want) for their life. They actually visualize and plan their best reality while others are merely spectators of life.
14. They innovate rather than imitate.
15. They don’t procrastinate and they don’t spend their life waiting for the ‘right time’.
16. They are life-long learners. They constantly work at educating themselves, either formally (academically), informally (watching, listening, asking, reading, student of life) or experientially (doing, trying)… or all three.
17. They are glass half full people - while still being practical and down-to-earth. They have an ability to find the good.
18. They consistently do what they need to do, irrespective of how they are feeling on a given day. They don’t spend their life stopping and starting.
19. They take calculated risks - financial, emotional, professional, and psychological.
20. They deal with problems and challenges quickly and effectively, they don’t put their head in the sand. They face their challenges and use them to improve themselves.
21. They don’t believe in, or wait for fate, destiny, chance or luck to determine or shape their future. They believe in, and are committed to actively and consciously creating their own best life.
22. While many people are reactive, they are proactive. They take action before they have to.
23. They are more effective than most at managing their emotions. They feel like we all do but they are not slaves to their emotions.
24. They are good communicators and they consciously work at it.
25. They have a plan for their life and they work methodically at turning that plan into a reality. Their life is not a clumsy series of unplanned events and outcomes.
26. Their desire to be exceptional means that they typically do things that most won’t. They become exceptional by choice. We’re all faced with live-shaping decisions almost daily. Successful people make the decisions that most won’t and don’t.
27. While many people are pleasure junkies and avoid pain and discomfort at all costs, successful people understand the value and benefits of working through the tough stuff that most would avoid.
28. They have identified their core values (what is important to them) and they do their best to live a life which is reflective of those values.
29. They have balance. While they may be financially successful, they know that the terms money and success are not interchangeable. They understand that people who are successful on a financial level only, are not successful at all. Unfortunately we live in a society which teaches that money equals success. Like many other things, money is a tool. It’s certainly not a bad thing but ultimately, it’s just another resource. Unfortunately, too many people worship it.
30. They understand the importance of discipline and self-control. They are strong. They are happy to take the road less travelled.
31. They are secure. They do not derive their sense of worth of self from what they own, who they know, where they live or what they look like.
32. They are generous and kind. They take pleasure in helping others achieve.
33. They are humble and they are happy to admit mistakes and to apologize. They are confident in their ability, but not arrogant. They are happy to learn from others. They are happy to make others look good rather than seek their own personal glory.
34. They are adaptable and embrace change, while the majority are creatures of comfort and habit. They are comfortable with, and embrace, the new and the unfamiliar.
35. They keep themselves in shape physically, not to be mistaken with training for the Olympics or being obsessed with their body. They understand the importance of being physically well. They are not all about looks, they are more concerned with function and health. Their body is not who they are, it’s where they live.
36. They have a big engine. They work hard and are not lazy.
37. They are resilient. When most would throw in the towel, they’re just warming up.
38. They are open to, and more likely to act upon, feedback.
39. They don’t hang out with toxic people.
40. They don’t invest time or emotional energy into things which they have no control of.
41. They are happy to swim against the tide, to do what most won’t. They are not people pleasers and they don’t need constant approval.
42. They are more comfortable with their own company than most.
43. They set higher standards for themselves (a choice we can all make), which in turn produces greater commitment, more momentum, a better work ethic and of course, better results.
44. They don’t rationalize failure. While many are talking about their age, their sore back, their lack of time, their poor genetics, their ‘bad luck’, their nasty boss and their lack of opportunities (all good reasons to fail), they are finding a way to succeed despite all their challenges.
45. They have an off switch. They know how to relax, enjoy what they have in their life and to have fun.
46. Their career is not their identity, it’s their job. It’s not who they are, it’s what they do.
47. They are more interested in effective than they are in easy. While the majority look for the quickest, easiest way (the shortcut), they look for the course of action which will produce the best results over the long term.
48. They finish what they start. While so many spend their life starting things that they never finish, successful people get the job done - even when the excitement and the novelty have worn off, and even when it’s not fun.
49. They are multi-dimensional, amazing, wonderful complex creatures (as we all are). They realize that not only are they physical and psychological beings, but emotional and spiritual creatures as well. They consciously work at being healthy and productive on all levels.
50. They practice what they preach. They don’t talk about the theory, they live the reality.
A Story of Bill Russell (Legendary Celtic Basketball Player) by Jim Rohn:
Most people dread accepting responsibility. That’s just a fact of life, and we can see it in operation every day. Yes, we can see avoidance of responsibility all the time in both our personal and professional lives. And here’s something else we can see just as often: We can see that most people aren’t as successful as they wish they were. Do you see there is a connection between these two very common phenomena?
It’s in your best interest to take responsibility for everything you do. But that’s only the beginning. Many times it’s even best to take responsibility for the mistakes of others, especially when you’re in a managerial or leadership role.
During the years when professional basketball was just beginning to become really popular, Bill Russell, who played center for the Boston Celtics, was one of the greatest players in the pro league. He was especially known for his rebounding and his defensive skills.
But like a lot of very tall centers, Russell was never much of a free throw shooter. His free throw percentage was quite a bit below average, in fact. But this low percentage didn’t really give a clear picture of Russell’s ability as an athlete. And in one game he gave a very convincing demonstration of this.
It was the final game of a championship series between Boston and the Los Angeles Lakers. With about 12 seconds left to play, the Lakers were behind by one point and Boston had the ball. It was obvious that the Lakers would have to foul one of Boston’s players in order to get the ball back, and they chose to foul Bill Russell.
This was a perfectly logical choice, since statistically Russell was the worst free throw shooter on the court at that moment. If he missed the shot, the Lakers would probably get the ball back and they’d still have enough time to try to win the game. But if Russell made his first free throw, the Lakers’ chances would be seriously diminished. And if he made both shots, the game would essentially be over.
Bill Russell had a very peculiar style of shooting free throws. Today, no self-respecting basketball player anywhere in America would attempt it. Aside from the question of whether it’s an effective way to shoot a basket, it just looked too ridiculous. Whenever he had to shoot a free throw, the six-foot-eleven Russell would start off holding the ball in both hands about waist high, then he’d squat down and as he straightened up he’d let go of the ball. It looked like he was trying to throw a bucket of dirt over a wall.
But regardless of how he looked, as soon as Bill Russell was fouled, he knew the Celtics were going to win the game. He was absolutely certain of it because, in a situation like this, statistics and percentages mean nothing. There was a much more important factor at work, something that no one has found a way to express in numbers and decimal points.
Simply put, Bill Russell was a player who wanted to take responsibility for the success or failure of his team. He wanted the weight on his shoulders in a situation like this. No possibility for excuses. No possibility of blaming anyone else if the game was lost. No second-guessing. Bill Russell wanted the ball in his own hands and nobody else’s. And, like magic, even if he’d missed every free throw he’d ever shot in his life before this, he knew he was going to make this one. And that is exactly what happened.
That is what virtually always happens when a man or woman accepts responsibility eagerly and with confidence. I’ve always felt that accepting responsibility is one of the highest forms of human maturity. A willingness to be accountable, to put yourself on the line, is really the defining characteristic of adulthood.
Bobby was getting cold sitting in his backyard in the snow. Bobby didn't wear boots; he didn't like them and anyway, he didn't own any. The thin sneakers he wore had a few holes in them and they did a poor job keeping out the cold.
Bobby had been in his backyard for about an hour already. And, try as he might, he could not come up with an idea for his mother's Christmas gift. He shook his head as he thought, “This is useless. Even if I do come up with an idea, I don't have any money to spend.”
Ever since his father had passed away three years earlier, the family of five had struggled. It wasn't because his mother didn't care, or try. There just never seemed to be enough. She worked nights at the hospital, but the small wage that she was earning could only be stretched so far.
What the family lacked in money and material things, it more than made up for in love and family unity. Bobby had two older and one younger sister, who ran the household in their mother's absence.
All three of his sisters had already made beautiful gifts for their mother. Somehow it just wasn't fair. Here it was Christmas Eve already, and he had nothing.
Wiping a tear from his eye, Bobby kicked the snow and started to walk down to the street where the shops and stores were. It wasn't easy being six without a father, especially when he needed a man to talk to.
Bobby walked from shop to shop, looking into each decorated window. Everything seemed so beautiful and so out of reach. It was starting to get dark, and Bobby reluctantly turned to walk home when suddenly his eyes caught the glimmer of the setting sun's rays reflecting off something along the curb. He reached down and discovered a shiny dime.
Never before has anyone felt so wealthy as Bobby felt at that moment. As he held his new found treasure, a warmth spread throughout his entire body and he walked into the first store he saw. His excitement quickly turned cold when salesperson after salesperson told him that he could not buy anything with only a dime.
He saw a flower shop and went inside to wait in line. When the shop owner asked if he could help him, Bobby presented the dime and asked if he could buy one flower for his mother's Christmas gift. The shop owner looked at Bobby and his 10-cent offering. Then he put his hand on Bobby's shoulder and said to him, “You just wait here and I'll see what I can do for you.”
As Bobby waited, he looked at the beautiful flowers, and even though he was a boy, he could see why mothers and girls liked flowers.
The sound of the door closing as the last customer left jolted Bobby back to reality. All alone in the shop, Bobby began to feel alone and afraid.
Suddenly the shop owner came out and moved to the counter. There, before Bobby's eyes, lay twelve long-stem red roses, with leaves of green and tiny white flowers all tied together with a big silver bow. Bobby's heart sank as the owner picked them up and placed them gently into a long white box.
“That will be 10 cents young man,” the shop owner said, reaching out his hand for the dime. Slowly, Bobby moved his hand to give the man his dime. Could this be true? No one else would give him a thing for his dime! Sensing the boy's reluctance, the shop owner added, “I just happened to have some roses on sale for 10 cents a dozen. Would you like them?”
This time Bobby did not hesitate, and when the man placed the long box into his hands, he knew it was true. Walking out the door that the owner was holding for him, he heard the shop keeper say, “Merry Christmas, son.”
As he returned inside, the shop keeper’s wife walked out. “Who were you talking to back there and where are the roses you were fixing?” Staring out the window and blinking the tears from his eyes, he replied, “A strange thing happened to me this morning. While I was setting up things to open the shop, I thought I heard a voice telling me to set aside a dozen of my best roses for a special gift. I wasn't sure at the time whether I had lost my mind or what, but I set them aside anyway. Then just a few minutes ago, a little boy came into the shop and wanted to buy a flower for his mother with one small dime.
“When I looked at him, I saw myself many years ago. I too was a poor boy with nothing to buy my mother for a Christmas gift. A bearded man, whom I never knew, stopped me on the street and told me that he wanted to give me 10 dollars.
“When I saw that little boy tonight, I knew who that voice was, and I put together a dozen of my very best roses.”
The shop owner and his wife hugged each other tightly, and as they stepped out into the bitter cold air, they somehow didn't feel cold at all.
